It was supposed to be a lavish, public mending of fences.

Insiders said that at 96, Queen Elizabeth II was well aware that the Platinum Jubilee would likely be one of her final official engagements, and she wanted to leave public life on a high note by creating peace among the warring factions of her family.

And dammit, she almost pulled it off!

The Queen personally invited Harry and Meghan to the Jubilee during the couple’s visit to the UK in April (their first return trip as a couple since they decamped for America in 2020).

The stage was set for a family reunion with the eyes of the world looking on.

The hope among royalists was that observers across the globe would get the message that as a family and an institution, the royals are still going strong.

But, as anyone who’s ever tried to bring together a dysfunctional family knows, some bonds were meant to stay broken.

Yes, as the dust settles from the epic Jubilee celebrations (we hope all our UK and Commonwealth readers enjoyed their four-day weekend!), the post-mortem analysis reveals an event that was decidedly not the PR boon that the royals had hoped.

For starters, #AbolishTheMonarchy was trending on Twitter throughout the long weekend, which is probably not what the royals had in mind when they decided to throw their loyal subjects a bone in the form of a couple of days off of work.

On top of that, insiders are saying that the divide between the Sussexes and the rest of the Royal Family is now deeper than ever.

Of course, that narrative is driven largely by the beans on toast-eating vultures who comprise the British tabloid press.

As usual, the top vitriol-spewer is Dan Wootton of The Daily Mail, who recently wrote that the royals were “horrified” by Meghan and Harry’s behavior at the Jubilee.

In fact, he claims that the royals prefer Prince Andrew to Meghan.

Mind you, Andrew recently paid off his sexual assault victim with money he borrowed from the Queen.

He wasn’t at any of the Jubilee celebrations, but Wootton says he still ranks higher than Meghan, who allegedly upset her in-laws with her “detached” demeanor.

Wootton wasn’t alone in his baseless trash talk, of course.

Other bottom-rung try-hards also teed off Harry and Meghan during the latest installment of True Royalty TV’s always-embarrassing Royal Beat.

“Harry has given up being Captain of the Royal Marines, who were out in force. I think he must have gone home feeling very depressed for what he has given up,” historian Hugo Vickers said.

“Those four days will haunt Prince Harry for the rest of his life. They [The Duke and Duchess of Sussex] were relegated to sitting behind the Duke of Gloucester [at the Thanksgiving service],” jorunalist Duncan Larcombe chimed in.

“They didn’t take part in any way, shape or form visibly at the Trooping of the Colour… [Harry] will be fuming about the way he and his family were treated.

“I honestly think it’s [because]… they knew that they wouldn’t be in that front row. And why did they leave the Royal Family?” royal expert Katie Nicholl asked.

“They left because they weren’t in the front row. I believe that’s why they weren’t at the other celebrations as they did not have centre stage seats.

You get the idea.

Was there some tension between Meghan and the Windsor clan? Almost certainly.

But it’s also important to bear in mind that an army of professional haters would be left with nothing to hate on if Meghan started getting along with her in-laws.

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