Well, we’ve heard it all.

If the airing of dirty laundry in public was a phrase coined for anything, it would be Rebekah Vardy’s £3million libel case against Coleen Rooney, the trial of the century deliciously dubbed Wagatha Christie.

The curtain dropped on this almost two week-long blockbuster last Thursday with closing statements, a visibly upset Vardy, black-suited, alone, while the Rooneys sent apologies – they were off on their hols. Mrs Justice Steyn will now consider her judgement.

You’ll no doubt be familiar with the highlights of this High Court battle between two footballers’ wives.

The mobile phone, whoops, accidentally dumped in Davy Jones’ North Sea locker (Who…?). Coleen’s near-split with Derby manager husband Wayne after yet another indiscretion.

And, yep, Peter Andre’s chipolata.

The extraordinary case, brought by 40-year-old Mrs Vardy after Mrs Rooney, 36, accused her of leaking stories to the press has been titillating, eye-watering, and nauseating by turns.

Ultimately, we’re left agog, asking simply: Why? Why not rant privately over a G&T?

Block, hate and carry on in style.

Why have two women with it all, risked such an excruciatingly public showdown from which they may never recover? What’s driven these WAGs? It’s a game of two other halves…

Rebekah Vardy

Coleen may have been the one sporting the leg cast, but some wonder if Rebekah will ever
recover from the injury to her reputation. Even with a win in the case she brought, everyone is damaged.

Amid screenshots of unsavoury WhatsApp messages between herself and former agent, Caroline Watt – messages littered with gossip, scheming, and foul language – plus accusations about her pursuit of profile and money, Rebekah has broken down in tears and repeatedly left court early.

The personal cost has been high. She admitted giving evidence had been “exhausting, intimidating”.

Yet, she knew all this was coming. The mother of five knew which (walk-in) closets would be rifled.

Explaining her motivation, she said: “I didn’t do anything wrong. I wanted to clear my name, and not just for me, for my family and my children.”

Sources close to her suggest outrage at the abuse she suffered when Coleen made her accusation continues to drive her.

When Coleen’s Wagatha Christie post went viral in October 2019, Rebekah was heavily pregnant with daughter Olivia.

A pal said: “She feared she would lose her baby as trolls hounded her day and night.

“She was in a very dark place and, give her credit, the fact she got through this onslaught is extraordinary. It also made her even more determined to hold Coleen accountable.”

Battling is also in her nature. Rebekah once said: “I just go into full fight mode. Sometimes it’s probably not the best thing to do, but it’s all I know how to do.”

It’s easy to understand when you know her background.

She says she was labelled a “problem child” after her parents, a window cleaner and a DJ, split.

She says she was abused from the age of 12 by a family friend, and claims her mum did not believe her. Rebekah has said she attempted suicide, and became homeless at 15.

She admits later making “horrific choices with men”, which led to two failed marriages, at just 18 and 23.

It was only in 2014 that she met Jamie Vardy and seemingly found the stability and love she craved.

But even now, despite the couple’s wealth, she has admitted a gnawing insecurity.

She once said: “I never really trust in it. You can have something incredible and the next minute it can be taken away from you.”

Defending her lucrative profile may be a motivation for this trial. But you sense there is also a desire to be liked, loved.

Despite the “resting bitch face” – her words – she does seem to care what people think.

Unfortunately, even with a win, widespread sympathy may not be her prize.

Coleen Rooney

Anyone who recalls the first public photographs of Coleen as a teenage schoolgirl will accept hers was not a celebrity courted.

She was thrust into the limelight, and has never seemed to love it – though she enjoys frequent holidays such as Thursday’s trip to Dubai.

Coleen admitted last week she has “used” commercial opportunities but heavy social media use and reality shows have never been her.

The mum of four has not seemed to crave public fawning, either.

Perhaps a solid family background explains that self-esteem. So why make “Scousetrap” so painfully public when it did not need to be?

And why do we hear rumours of a Netflix documentary telling her side of the story? A personal camera crew does not seem characteristic.

Wagatha has not proved cheap but Coleen also appears ferociously determined to be heard.

Sources insist she did not want a public trial. While the court heard claims of her relishing the fallout – a Scooby Doo meme “unmasking the villain” saved on her phone – Wayne said she has “really struggled”.

A source says: “Six months ago, Coleen offered to drop hands and for both her and Rebekah to pick
up their own court costs.

“It would have drawn a line under this ugly affair but Becky refused.

“This was the last thing Coleen wanted. She sees her fight as a matter of principle. Even if she loses, she firmly believes she is on the right side of history.”

Coleen was clearly deeply hurt by the leaks. This is a woman who has lived in the spotlight for 20 years.

Plus a husband whose humiliating indiscretions have done little to soften the glare.

She has always kept schtum but this time the simmering reached boiling point after believing a personal contact had betrayed her.

Coleen said: “This thing was not just thought of overnight. I did think of it for a long time. As I’ve said, I’m not one who just jumps on things.”

The timing is interesting, too.

When Coleen was mounting evidence, headlines about Wayne jumping into the car of a barmaid during a US bender were breaking.

Last week, evidence of Rebekah’s concerned messages to Coleen at that time, which Coleen claimed were “fishing for information”, emerged. This was a woman scorned again, being rubber-necked again, and, she felt, in the most
disingenuous way.

She has always played dignified silence well but restraint takes a toll.

Coleen claimed a private chat with Rebekah would have ended in denials. But a public Wagatha also gave her a vent to scream, finally.

She has also broken her silence on Wayne’s misdemeanours for the first time in a Netflix documentary, calling them “not acceptable”.

She revealed the upset caused by a story, which she believes was leaked from her Instagram, after Wayne’s drink-driving incident with another woman in 2017.

Candidly, she admitted: “Me and Wayne were trying to figure out our relationship and where we were going.

“But I didn’t want the public to know that… I hadn’t settled on, ‘This is it, we are getting back together’.”

We now see a woman no longer playing meekly on the sidelines.

And as she went into battle, one man was coming with her, however excruciating he found it.